17 weeks 3 days
Like the snow effect? Cool add-on from the people at WordPress…
The Christmas cards are in the mail, the tree (a real tree – Janay wins again) is up, we’ve watched the movie Elf, shopped until we dropped, and had our eggnog lattes from Starbucks – I’d say the Destellos are ready for Christmas.
For a while there, I really thought we were going to get pounded with snow. The temperature was getting into the teens, the roads were dry, but occasionally there would be a shocker patch of ice – that made driving pretty nerve-wracking. But it finally got warmer and the rain came back – I never thought I’d miss the rain, but I did. I’m so glad Baby D is due in the Spring – I won’t have to worry about racing to the hospital in a snow storm.
I keep thinking – this time next year, Baby D will be with us, and Christmas will have a whole new meaning. It will be so much more fun – starting new traditions, sharing old ones, making up stories about who Santa is, what he knows, and what he can do.
I imagine getting really involved in it… filling the house with evidence of Santa’s visit on Christmas Eve, putting hoof prints on the lawn, setting up toys, and stuffing their stockings so when they come into the living room Christmas morning – that’s all they see. That was always my favorite part of Christmas, and something I couldn’t wait to do for my own kids.
My cousin, Cohney and I at Grandma's on Christmas Eve
Every Christmas Eve when I was a kid, the whole family would meet up at my grandma’s house to celebrate. The Christmas tree was always set up in the basement, along with our stockings, and presents. The basement would be off-limits to me and my cousins until Grandma said it was okay to go down.
Sometime during the evening, my dad would get called away for work. It happened every year – he’d get a call from the office and would have to leave the party. It was always upsetting, but I would forget about it when Grandma said we could finally go downstairs. Pandemonium is the way I remembered it – me and my cousins scrambling down the stairs, running to our stockings, and ripping them from the mantel. The adults would follow us down, and hand out presents.
Eventually, we’d hear sleigh bells and a “Ho-Ho-Ho, merry Christmas!” coming down the stairs, and we’d all come unglued! Santa would sit on a chair, and take each one of us on his lap, ask what we wanted for Christmas, and hand out presents from his over-stuffed, red velvet bag.
I don’t remember how I found out, but one year when my dad was called away for business again, I finally put two and two together, and when Santa came down the stairs that year, I realized he was my dad! It’s funny how you can go from believing in something like Santa one year, and the next year – the magic is gone.
A lot changed over the years after that – family moved away, my parents divorced, my grandparents sold their house, and I grew up. It seems that the further I got from Grandma’s house on Christmas Eve, the more uninspiring Christmas seemed to become.
As a young adult, I hated Christmas. It seemed like the most miserable, commercialized holiday out there. And every year I dreaded it… the music, the crowds of people shopping, the maddening traffic. It wasn’t until I met Janay that I started to feel the magic of Christmas again. It’s like she opened up the basement to my heart, and I can run downstairs all over again and feel the ecstatic joy that Christmas can bring.
Every year now, I find myself wanting to be with family and revel in the traditions of Christmas. I even like the music and tend to get all squishy-sentimental when I hear songs like I’ll Be Home for Christmas or Silver Bells.
I’m really looking forward to giving our children the gift of Christmas by sharing these traditions with them. I especially look forward to bringing them to Salt Lake to meet Santa, played by my dad, who still gets called away every year for work – some things never change.
Happy holidays to all of you! May the spirit of the season open doors in your heart, too.
Filed under: Discoveries | 1 Comment
Tags: christmas, family, grandma, santa
16 weeks 5 days
Janay and Baby D @ 4 months
We’ve been so busy lately trying to use up all of our flight benefits before they’re gone for good (January 2010). Mostly, we’ve spent a lot of time in Phoenix, which has been really terrif, but we’ll miss the Phoenix crew more when we can’t fly there at a whim.
One of those trips to Phoenix, Janay had a terrible migraine (she’s decided morning sickness is better than headaches), the only thing that saved her from an ER trip was our friend Ramboud who is a chiropractor – the first night we were in Phoenix, he gave her an adjustment and her migraine slowly faded to headache for the rest of the trip. Thank you, Pagona for arranging it, and thank you Ramboud for cracking her back to life!
We spent Thanksgiving with the Peterson family in Salt Lake and got our fill of all of our family there – especially the nieces and nephews who range in age from 11 to 2. I just can’t ever get over how fast they grow, or how good it feels when they run up and hug you for no apparent reason. I’m excited to introduce Baby D to them next year. Baby D is going to get around the family circuit, in August, there is an Odden Cousin’s Reunion in Minneapolis. It’s going to be fun touring Baby D around the country… I hope she/he likes airplane rides.
Meanwhile, the morning sickness and headaches have subsided and Janay is officially showing! Now begins that “honeymoon” phase of pregnancy, which should bring less sickness and more happy days. The baby is about 5 inches long from head to rump, can hear sound, sense light, and suck their thumb. This week the baby should start putting on some body fat, and then it’s just a matter of time before Janay feels the first kick!
We’ll get a look at who is inside there on January 4th, so stay tuned for pictures and an announcement on the baby’s gender (place your bets now).
Filed under: Discoveries | 4 Comments
Tags: chiropractor, flying, honeymoon, migraine, phoenix
13 weeks 5 days
Time travels alarmingly fast. Janay’s been pregnant for more than 3 months now – only 6 months left! Actually, 184 days – but who’s counting?
This morning Janay woke up voracious – instead of bringing her the usual anti-nausea foods, she wanted cereal, and later joked that she felt so hungry, the curtains looked like they would be good with a smear of peanut butter.
I think her spirit guardians are really looking out for her these days. Last week we were out to eat at Sushiland (where she was eating mostly California rolls), and she said – “I could really go for some tempura shrimp.” I’m not exaggerating when I say – 30 seconds later, one of the sushi chefs walked up and said “Would you like this tempura shrimp?” it was pretty amazing timing, but I think her spirit guardians had something to do with it. She’s pretty much getting everything she’s been asking the universe for lately… I asked her to ask for a million dollars.. I’m still waiting to hear back.
Meanwhile, life is good – we’ve been nesting, and even have the crib set up in our bedroom. Bella has approved all of the changes so we’re good to go.
Speaking of the crib – there was a trick to bringing the crib home. My friend Carrie went with me to pick it up, and I was thinking – How big could the box be? The crib seems like it would fit in Carrie’s Honda Fit, so I think we’ll be alright. But when I saw the box next to the Fit, I thought – that won’t fit… it’s the size of the Fit – maybe bigger.
I mean, REALLY! this was a very large box. I felt very determined to get that crib home and set up before Janay got home from work, so I asked the sales lady if I could just take it out of the box there and put the actual parts in the car? She was fine with it – so right there on the sidewalk of the Babies-R-Us, we started ripping into the packaging.
Packing material was flying all over the place, and the three of us trying to figure out “is this a piece of the crib, or is it extra packaging?” People were walking by, staring at us and undoubtedly wondering how in the heck were we going to fit it in the Fit.
Turns out that most of that box was packaging, and without it the crib fit in the Fit just fine. Doing it this way solved another problem too – what to do with all that packaging material! The lady just took it all away… awesomeness.
Here’s a picture of Bella testing the crib for safety and comfort…
So – about this name thing…
We’ve decided to keep our name ideas private until the baby is born. We realize that this will probably drive a lot of you mad, but you only have to wait 184 days to find out what we chose. In the meantime, we’d love to know what names are you favorite – so bring it on!
Filed under: Discoveries | 7 Comments
Tags: appetite, babies r us, baby names, crib, honda fit, peanut butter curtains
11 weeks 5 days
Hopefully, I won’t jinx myself again…. but… the lemon thing sort of worked.. we hope. We’re going to try it again tomorrow and see if we have the same result. But as of this second, Janay is feeling great!
Last night, I got this book from our friend Kelly called Confessions of the Other Mother: Non-Biological Lesbian Moms Tell All. I had no idea how much I needed this book – I cracked it open, a hour flew by and I’d read half the book. Anyone who knows me understands what a feat this is – it generally takes me about 6 months to read a book.
This is the first book I’ve seen that is specifically for me. There are some books out there that are for dads, but they are obviously tailored to men. And I’ve been reading all the “I’m Pregnant” books. This is book is great to hear stories from women in the same position as I am. Like that endless search for a good name to go by.
I often try on names for us that I’ve heard other couples using… Mama J and Mama R… nah. Mama and Baba… doesn’t feel right since my neice Airen used to say “baba” as in “bottle” when she was a baby. Do I go all mavericky and go by Daddy? Our neighbors, a gay couple who have two children have one of the dads going by “Mommy.” Or what about just Ma or Mom? What if I just went by Rebecca?
I don’t want to complicate my kid’s life life by using a name that will just cause confusion in the outside world. Society has well used titles for each relation to the child – variations on mom, dad, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, etc. We all think we know what each of these titles means, but since our family is slightly different from other families, we are at liberty to change the rules – which is a good thing, but it creates this kind of processing.
Janay and I have talked about going by Mommy and Mama, but our dog Bella knows us both as Mama (either one of us can say “Where’s Mama?” and she’ll try to find the other mama), so it would be a big change for Janay to start going by something else. Is it fair to ask her to change? Mommy is cute on Janay, but just doesn’t feel right at all on me… it almost feels like wearing a dress! Mama seems right, it just fits me and in trying to find my name in all of this, I can’t help but want to have my own special name, some word that when I hear our baby first say it, I know they are calling to ME.
Speaking of the baby… the other night, while we were watching TV, I had my hand on Janay’s belly, and she felt Baby D move! She described the feeling as butterflies, but I could describe it as the baby’s way of saying I LOVE YOU, MAMA!
Filed under: Discoveries | 11 Comments
Tags: identity, morning sickness, names, other mother
Just when you thought Janay’s morning sickness couldn’t get worse, it just did. The sickness has decided not only will it stick around throughout the day, but now it is actually making her lose her crackers.
I’ve tried like heck (yes, heck) to help with her nausea. Every morning I bring seltzer water, cheese stick, crackers, Tums, and her iPhone to her bedside. Sometimes one of these items will help (or at least distract) her, but eventually the sick just comes busting back in.
After 11 and a half weeks of this, Janay is, of course desperate to break the cycle, so I’ve been on the web all morning trying to find what works best. So far, the consensus is that bubbly drinks, crackers, sea bands, lemon scent, and B6 are the best natural ways to reduce the nausea. Lemon scent and B6 are new ones for me, so I’ll be adding them to the regimen.
Speaking of adding to the regimen… the other night, I witnessed an event that I never thought I would see in my life – Janay, elbow deep in fried chicken. Apparently, Baby D is not a vegetarian.
During the past couple of weeks, Janay’s been craving cold, Safeway, fried chicken (it has to be Safeway). And after 20 some years of Janay living her life as a vegetarian, it’s incredibly strange to see her happily devouring a piece of fried chicken.
This might sound totally cheeseball, but her willingness to go beyond her personal beliefs for the sake of our child, makes her even more beautiful to me… I know, right? Pure cheese.
Filed under: Discoveries | 1 Comment
Tags: cravings, fried chicken, morning sickness
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